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.: 12.22.2008 


This year has not been very fun.

I feel like I'm behind all the time.

Like all I want to do is work on the AC and yet when I have time all I want to do is anything but work at all.

As miserable as the cruise was, it was nice to be completely cut off from everything and everyone for five whole days.

I feel like I need a month off to 1) be lazy long enough to get bored of it and actually do something, 2) catch up on the AC, 3) organize my projects at work and start actually working on them.

Watching Hubby get ass-raped at work day after day has not been fun. In theory this is supposed to get better as we've hired someone, but watching Hubby be disappointed that it wasn't him isn't fun either.

We declared bankruptcy this year. I hadn't said anything on here because I didn't want it to be something that I dragged along and whinged about all year. But it basically took all year, and we got a little screwed in the process because our lawyer promised one thing and delivered another and never ever took a breath to say she was sorry. We'll survive, but this entire year has been so full of elevated-and-then-crushed hopes that I'm just exhausted thinking about it.

I feel trapped in this state - this mental state and this physical commonwealth.

I can only guess this is why I'm spending so much time crushing on Tim's voice. It's a pastime, an amusing and non-threatening escape, a chance to be 12 years old again except this time you know the guy really does kinda like you back. Let's call him Cute John v 2.0.

I'm usually so lucky, I wonder what happened this year. Or perhaps my year was slated to be much worse and this IS me being lucky.

2008, I won't miss you a lick. 2009, I'll only love you because I hope you are leading to the sweet oblivion of 2012. If the world doesn't end, I'm going to be so. very. disappointed.


thus proclaimeth the Zabet  3:44 PM  

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